What is Battlefield 3?
Nothing says “I love Jesus“, like killing terrorists and taking down glitter lipped homosexual sleeper cells that are trying to smear musky death and destruction across American’s virgin loins. “BF3” even gives you even get the chance to take down some no good Canadian ice Mexicans, who are trying to smuggle their countries low moral standards over our boarders and infect our children with their gayness and weak will. In the game Battlefield 3, the player is submerged into a world of true American grit and tightly wraps the player with manly imagery of patriotism, anti-homosexuality and Christian-American values.

What is also great about this game, is that it takes those evil Japanese consoles and turns them into a learning hub for glorious American traditions and a center piece for family fun. Dad and son can co-op play missions and frag some nasty drug dealers in Mexico City, or you can blanket a homosexual training facility with mom’s air strike she just won for painting multiple head shots on the foreheads of international criminals. Brother and sister can team up and stab evil in the back with an assortment of Made in the USA blades. A family that protects America together, stays together.

Unlike the homo gay supporting company Blizzard, D.I.C.E. (Destroy Idiot Communists and Europeans), has built a franchise of games that fight that damage that homosexuals and liberals have digitally fornicated into the minds of our children. D.I.C.E. has made it their mission to develop games the strike fear into the hearts of non-American loving sinners and train our children with vital moral nutrition and teach them how to stand up to the world’s evils without fear. Yes, D.I.C.E. may have the most advanced graphics in their video games and the bloodshed is quite realistic, but remember it is the blood of America’s enemies and children need to see that they do bleed when they’ve had a their bodies pumped with a full magazine clip from a Mp5 at close range. Unlike games like Modern Warfare 3, BF3 doesn’t rely on “tea bagging” gay antics to sell copies, it uses American pride to push it’s sells.

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