The Danger:
The scent of demonic secretion wafts its foul odor yet again across the innocent genitals of America’s youth, trying to grip their meat bananas in the most uncomfortable homosexual manner known to man. This new veil of necormatic rape comes to us in the form of WASD keyboard pounding and with each mouse left click of molestation, brings your child closer to a lifestyle of urgefully wanting homosexually produced devil DNA inside of them and will increase the temptation of wanting taint tug their musky man candy or end up having unprotected fecal farming sex with skanky females or prancing fecal bandits. What is this new form of mind fisting you ask? Where did I go wrong as a parent you might be thinking? How did I allow my child to walk a path of utter death? Let me tell you, this hellspawn of soppy man mucus was brought into your house the day you allowed your children to engage in MMORPGing. Massive Multiple Orgy Role Playing Games are bringing the destruction of children and its latest phallic swindler is called Guild Wars 2.

Guild Wars 2 is laced with drug references, cut scenes of gay men trying to fill each other’s prairie dog holes with large battle axes, black magic witches casting sexual urge spells and mythical creatures that will for sure cause your child to want to live some sort of loser goth lifestyle.

The Name:
Did you know the word “Guild” is used in the gay community to describe underground drug clubs that are frequented by dangerous sugar plummed anal fairies looking to fecal plow young children? These clubs are also where gays go to have solo jousting circle competitions. Did you also know the acronym used for Guild Wars 2 is GW2? That is the same acronym used by hot beef Harrys when they engage in a triple male prison dances. Basically even before your child installs the megabits of death binary into their computer,the game’s name is bombarding them with gay erotic undertones of reverse deification acts and possibly brainwashing them into wanting to explore themselves with a good sour cream wiggle session. The logo itself has a serpent and we all know that is the universal phallic symbol in black magic circles. If you think this is funny, please know that one person has already died from playing its beta release version.

Breaking Down The Release Date:
Guild Wars 2 is set to release 8-28-12, but did you know there was a reason for its numerical usage? Below I break down the numerical whorness of this release date. The numbers are just as dangerous as the lawn mowing Mexican Aztec calender, which tries to make people believe the new age of homosexuality will be among us in December, 2012.

8 – The number eight in 4chan talk, the talk used in MMORPG games, means two holes. Those two holes are the man’s sewer hole on top and the woman’s blood sewer below it.

28 – Again the MMORPG sign for sex holes and the number two stands for sex toy. When you put the two together it means penile injection of both holes with stiff jelly formed

This is a Tyson Bowers III certified review.

penetration projectiles.

12 – Again, a man’s sin stick and the number one in-front of it means a homosexaul, which makes the penile a homosexual love lurer.

When we look at the whole date together it comes out meaning all players should openly flaunt their holes for plastic pleasure poking and be wide open and allow themselves to be filled with pearly demon sap from that of a sickly infested penile of ass assassin.